Wonder Mamay

cto Yesterday was our 8th wedding anniversary. It was the most unique celebration we ever had. We celebrated it without talking. Don't get into the details, I don't ever want to go there. I'll just be sad and furious. I am now in the process of accepting things. Shit happens to the best of us. I've had had my share of issues also so I am not the right person to say something about it. Anyway, married life is a roller coaster ride. Lots of fights, adjustments and enduring. I am not saying that I am a martyr and all of us should endure if we're married but sometimes it just gets so tiring that you just don't want to dwell in it anymore because the more you'll deal with it the bigger the issue would become. The best thing about situations like this is that we'll learn. I have learned my lessons the hard way but for sure it will change things for me, for us. A lot of things happened this past few days but eventually I'll get up from these and I ...

Same time last year, when Mitch was on her first grade, she also attended this kind of celebration, they participated in the "Sabayang Basa in Visayan" category back then, together with 14 or more of her classmates. Imagine how time flies so fast. It was like yesterday when I was nagging her to practice their piece, instructing her the proper way to do it and now we are doing the same, but this time its more serious because it's her all alone, competing for the "tula" competition. Although I still can't believe why she was chosen, I had to set my mind that I have to prepare her for that day because let's face it mothers, we are more excited and nervous for stuff like that than our kids. We practiced every night, we even practiced with microphone, I wanted badly for her to have the confidence because God knows how shy and quiet she is. I don't want to put her in a situation wherein she'll be humiliated because she forgot her piece and ruin all t...

on her 7th birthday I was supposed to blog about how proud I am of my daughter when I ran through some old pics and remembered that I wasn't able to blog about her 7th birthday. I even scanned through old facebook posts if I did post about her birthday but unfortunately, I forgot to write about that. Might as well write something about it here since 7th birthday is supposed to be a milestone for a child. On her 7th birthday we really were planning on going big, since we felt bad that we weren't able to give her a big birthday celebration on her first. Although I was already working at CEVI by then, but we were really broke at that time (until now actually), Papay has just started working then and I was payday to payday so we really can't afford a big celebration. We just had a simple dinner with the family and the next day we had a simple kiddie snack party with the kids from the neighborhood. Just as simple as that actually. From the plan of going big to this ...

Have you ever felt so down and you don't know just why you are feeling that way? I have been feeling that way. There are times that the moment I wake up, I just feel lonely and sad. When I try to rationalize things and get into the root cause why am I feeling that way,I can't think of a particular reason. It sometimes makes me worry that I even researched for it. It was nice that I was able to read stuff because it made everything lighter. Maybe it is true that it is due to our hormones, but nonetheless it made me worry less. Have you ever felt that way too? let's blame it to the hormones!! Mamay

Today is actually All Souls ' day but here I am sitting in front of my computer at the office. Yes, because today is a working day, unfortunately. October 31st and November 1 were the only days declared as non-working holidays. Oh well, so work it is. But actually there is nothing much to do in the office these days since the fiscal year has just been starting. So, here I am visiting my blog which I have neglected for quite some time now.  We have been discussing if we are going to visit to Batuan over the holiday since Papay is not working on that day, then yesterday the weather was so nice so Batuan we went. It was around 1 in the afternoon when we left, it was scorching hot in the city. I have so many plans in my head. I was planning to go to Shiphaus after we offer prayers to our departed loved ones over at the cemetery. I actually am not too fun of that Shiphaus because hello what's in there to be excited? It just happen to be a building formed like a ship because ma...

I am feeling giddy right now. I am so excited to build our own house. I want to go home in a home where I can say that it is the fruit of our hard work and of course, hard work in getting a loan. Because let's admit that, it's really hard to build a house with our savings because we can't even start to save. haha! But even though, I will be getting a loan just to have a house, I will be paying for it, so still, it is fruit of my work. But I am having trouble deciding where to get a loan. Haha! I am torn between getting a loan with this bank that offers bigger amount in 1% interest or with the COOP that I am thinking of joining that offers not that big amount but I get to have my share and savings. Hmm.. I really need to decide now. For me, who'll process faster and the one that will not cause me much hassle, I am with them. Because I need to get it ASAP, because there are still things that I need to settle besides building our house. I need to clear out my debts first...

It's raining almost everyday right, and rainy season can always make you feel emotional..well, that's for  me, I don't know with you. Just this morning as I was watching my 7-year old daughter being her grumpy self as always, I almost teared up. I was just overwhelmed with too much emotion and my memories went back memory lane when she was still inside my tummy and then when I gave birth to her and her growing up years..I was so filled with gladness and I was wondering, "How did we survived raising her up to what she is now?" I couldn't imagine us being too immature to be able to raise her. So bear with me as I take you down memory lane. I missed her chubby-chubby days. These I guess were taken after her teething period. She's thin na in these photos. I miss this hair so much and the cheeks, ka gigil! This age she's starting to be so grumpy and often whines. Her kulot hair says it all. Spoiled? Maybe be...

Let us open this post with a verse that says, "Trust the plans that God has laid for you." I don't really know which book that is from the bible but I am sure that there is something like that that the bible says. Anyway, I know that God has plans for my life and I strongly believe that this job that I have right now is part of His plans for me. I can truly affirm how amazing His ways are in fulfilling His plans for me. But there are times in my life that I doubt His plans for me. Being a working mom, that guilt feeling will never escape me, especially during times when my daughter is sick. I often question myself if am I still on the right path, if am I still doing the right thing, and I even asks God if this is really what He has planned for me. Whenever I am in situation like this, my faith really is shaken. This just goes to show that my faith for God's plan for me is not that sturdy. I am guilty of this and each time I am rebuked of how God provided everything...

Mitch when she was months old Lately I am being so sentimental and all, I am going through old photos of Mitch to be printed for my slum book and I can't keep myself not to be emotional looking through her baby pictures. Pause button please! Maybe because I feel so guilty not to give her quality time now that at her age because of work but I promise to make way. At her age now (7), everything that she will do now will be a part of her childhood memories, so I wanna fill her childhood with wonderful memories. So anyway, enough with my drama, let's go back to my main topic today which is "adulting" and all the things that comes with it. I am sharing this now because just recently Papay and I had a little misunderstanding, and the worst part is its all about MONEY. And that's one thing that I don't want to argue about. But things happen! We can't control things. We just have to deal with it, peacefully! Bottom line is, couples should have an open comm...

It's been so long since I last blogged, I had a hard time opening my blog because maybe of the new format. So anyway, let's get this started. Ever since Papay started working, we couldn't go out of the city anymore. Sometimes, I feel bad that we have to leave our daughter to the care of either my in laws or my parents'. She always whine when I have to travel because that means she'll be left somewhere and that breaks my heart each time. Although I am very happy that Papay is already working, but being a mother, a parent, I cannot avoid feeling guilty. She always asks for time together, for bonding, she is so clingy to us and seeks so much attention. I do understand exactly why she is acting that way, she wanted our attention because she feels that we're just too busy with work, we don't have time for her. But, that is very wrong, everything we do is for her. We want to provide for her needs, to give her the house we planned together, to be able to send he...

          Being a researcher requires so much of me. I have to be away from my family for days, weeks and so. Though I love my job, I get to go to places for free, learn their ways of life and meet different people and even make friends along the way..but, if you are a mother like me, it can also be heart-breaking, especially in times when your child/ren are not feeling well and you aren't there to comfort them.            That is exactly what I felt and continues to feel right now. My daughter is complaining that one of her ear is aching, she even cried when I called her. That really made me cry. I wanted so much to comfort her because I know it is painful but I just cant because I''m miles away from her. Then, we have decided to bring her to the doctor which even broke my heart because I can't be there with her during the doctor and worst her father can't also accompany her. She had to go to the doctor together with her uncle a...